Friday, 5 August 2016

Caitlyn Jenner contemplated suicide during transition

If you think Caitlyn Jenner's transition from male-to-female was easy, think again. The reality star revealed that she contemplated suicide early on in the process.
In speaking to Bill Simmons on his "Any Given Wednesday" program, she said that a paparazzo photographed her leaving a doctor's office after having an operation on her Adam's apple (she was living as Bruce Jenner at the time). The fear that her secret was about to get out took her to a dark place.
"I could not sleep that night. I'm up at 3 a.m. walking up and down my hallway, thinking, 'Damn, all this ---- is going to come out tomorrow and it's going to be horrible," she said. "And I said, 'You know what? Easy way. Go in the other room. You got a gun. Let's just end it right here.'"
"That's, like, the easy way out. No more pain, no more nothing," she said. "I don't have to deal with the tabloids any longer. I don't have to deal with any of this. And that was probably the lowest I've ever gotten."
The next day everything changed for her after going out for a walk.
"I thought, 'What a terrible way to end your life's story!' I don't want my story to end that way, on a negative note," she said. "That was the beginning of me turning my thinking around to say, 'OK, I think I can do this.'"
Fast forward to now and her life has never been better, she said, and that includes winning a gold medal at the 1976 Olympics.
"I have never been happier, more at ease with myself," she told the sports-oriented host. "I got my mojo back."
"Going through this, I have renewed my excitement for life. My life today is so interesting, so simple. It really is so simple!" she said. "I was in Vegas the other day—I had to give a speech—and I used to go to Vegas for years and years and years, and I liked to go to Vegas because I could sneak around. I could go to my hotel room, dress, cross-dress, actually go out and walk around. I would never talk to anybody because I knew my voice would give me away, and I never got caught. I could go out and just be myself and just walk around. But I had two suitcases. I'd have to talk the nail polish off, then put the nail polish back on.
"My life was so complicated, you know? And I'm struggling with all these issues," she said. "This time I went to Vegas, all I had to do was take one suitcase. I go downstairs, I get dressed, I get ready, I go down and take a few selfies with people through the hotel, give my speech, live authentically. It was so simple!"

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